Gathering Your Care Community
If you want better postpartum care in the United States, you’ll have to organize it yourself. The standard of care as it stands drops mothers at the curb and drives off. So it is up the families to gather their tribe - their safety net - their life boat - so when they face adversity in the early postpartum or you just want to feel comforted and loved for, you’ll have a list of care providers to support you.
What to do:
Grab a piece of paper or open a word document to start a list - yes, a physical or digital list - WRITE. IT. OUT.
On the list, start thinking of all the potential care providers types & services you may want prenatally or postnatally (see my list below of examples!)
Search the internet, ask friends, ask your doctors - for the names and contact information of the care providers in your area that offer that service. Write down the providers name and contact information.
On the list, write down your TOP friends/family members that provide un-biased, deeply loving care and support- that listening ear that can hold space for the sadness, anger, and happiness that may arrive. People you trust. People that won’t shame you. People you feel the most comfortable around. Write down their names and contact info (YES, even if it is stored in your phone, write it down - someone else may use it later).
Add your list to the refrigerator or an easy to access place in your household. Tell your partner where it is at! If you made a digital version - share it with important people in your life and print a hard copy.
Bonus: Call in the help of your spouse/partner - they can help brainstorm services and search for providers! Start asking for help now.
Who should be on the list?
Below is a list of potential care providers & support services that you may want on your team in the postpartum. Again, this isn’t to say you will use all services - but it is best to over-prepare.
➡️ Postpartum doulas in your area
➡️ Lactation consultants
➡️ Back-up pediatricians if you find that you don’t click with the one you chose
➡️ Local food delivery services that focus on nutrient-dense meals (you need full nutrition not greasy fries in the early postpartum)
➡️ Massage therapists
➡️ Chiropractors
➡️ Nutritionists
➡️ Pelvic floor physical therapists
➡️ Mental health providers (example: therapists, psychiatrists, somatic practitioners)
➡️ Mother support groups in the area
➡️ Housecleaners
➡️ Dog walkers
➡️ Babysitters for your older children
➡️ Your most trusted friends/family members that provide un-biased compassionate support - that you feel completely safe around
➡️ Any other providers or services that would bring support & JOY to your family
Why should I ask for help?
The number one reason mothers should ask for help in the postpartum is so they can focus on what is important: CARING for their baby, BONDING with their baby, and RE-CONNECTING with their partner. Without support, mothers feel overwhelmed, depleted, and isolated. Mothers find themselves trying to do it all - clean the house - care for baby - wash the clothes - make food…and it comes at the cost of neglecting their own needs. When we ignore our own needs as the parent of a newborn, it easily leads to relationship tension (unhappy house), physical complications (urinary or fecal incontinence, organ prolapse, fatigue, pelvic floor dysfunction), and suffering mental health (depression, anxiety, identity crisis etc.).
Start making your list today!